Ponderings…Friend of a fellow

Heather Ainsley
ECB Publishing, Inc.

I have always been an animal lover, ever since I was a baby. This fascination, respect and appreciation for creatures big and small has absolutely no exceptions, which means that animals that commonly creep other people out are a huge hit with me. Bugs, rodents and all things that slither are just as welcome in my life as the cuter, more conventionally cuddly animals like dogs and cats. I'm the girl at the office who will save a yellow jacket trapped in the window, or that car on the road who brakes for wildlife.
As a young girl, I frequently spent time in my backyard, which was a bit like a jungle to me at the time, full of a great assortment of life, from the brave and bold animals, like birds, squirrels and lizards to the more private and shy ones, the pond frogs, snakes and all those insects that hid under rocks. I found my fair share of interesting friends, and was aways sure to return them to where they had been found after I was finished gazing at them in childish wonder.
With this hobby comes a certain level of risk, and even as a child, I knew there was danger. My parents instilled many good lessons in me, and even as a youngster, I knew that some things, like mushrooms, poisonous plants and mystery insects were “best for looking, not for touching.” Indeed, I was full of good advice, including such gems like, “don't put your fingers into mysterious holes,” and, “If you aren't sure, just don't. (don't touch, don't eat, don't approach. Just don't.)”
My love for snakes in particular led me to memorize a very common poem, helpful in identifying completely harmless snakes and their dangerously venomous look-alikes. Now, I was a child, and a forgetful one at that, but this poem was so important for me to remember that I repeated it over and over again, until it was burned into my memory:
Red against yellow, he's a good fellow. But red against black, stay away, Jack!
I probably don't need to tell most of you that are reading this that my memorized version of this poem is wrong. I misremembered it as a child, and filled in the blanks using what I was sure was the rhyme, burning it into my memory so that I would “always be safe.” Imagine my surprise when I was informed (as an adult, mind you) that the poem in fact goes like this:
Red against yellow, kills a fellow. Red against black, friend to Jack.
While there are countless variations to the exact phrases that can be interchanged depending on which version you grew up listening to, the only part that cannot be interchanged is the color reference. For those who don't know, this poem is a handy way to determine if a snake is a harmless Scarlet King snake, which has a ring pattern of red, black, yellow, black, red, and its venomous look-alike, the Eastern Coral snake, which has a ring pattern of red, yellow, black, yellow, red.
As you can imagine, this is an exceptionally helpful little poem to remember, just in case you are exploring the beautiful woods and a snake crosses your path. Some snakes are safe to simply shoo out of your way, and others should be avoided completely, and knowing which is which is very helpful, especially if you are like me and detest the phrase, “just kill it,” as a cure-all for snake-related uncertainties.
So, to recap, for my entire childhood of exploring the woods and wildlife of Florida, my memorization of “Red against yellow, he's a good fellow,” led me to frequently handle snakes that were in fact not good fellows. And my mindful avoidance of those fitting the description, “Red against black, stay away, Jack!” led me to avoid the few snakes that might have been just safe enough to hold.
The moral of this story is that if it isn't bothering you, don't bother it, and everyone is a lot more likely to stay safe. How I ever made it to adulthood is beyond me.
I think the heavier moral of this story is that it can be difficult to unlearn something that has been engrained in you.
Even if you someday learn that it is wrong. I think sooner or later, we all struggle to unlearn unhealthy and dangerous ideas that we memorized without knowing better. It is important to change your behavior once you learn that you're mistaken about something. To this day, I can only recall my version of the snake poem. All other versions get muddled in my mind, and make me unsure. But I know my version is wrong. To keep using it while handling snakes would be reckless and unwise. In order to determine if a ringed snake is safe or not, I have to first judge it based on my memorized poem from my childhood, and then assume the opposite is true of the slithering little fellow. While this method will certainly lead me to the correct and safe answer, it still leaves me a little wary of those colorful little rings.
The lighter moral of the story is just don't. If it isn't messing with you, you don't need to mess with it. Like mom and dad said, just don't. It is a lesson I have taken with me from childhood and have built upon in my adult life, creating the following rule: With some things in life, just don't. Even if you think you're sure.